I Believed This Would Be Hard.

So I Did Something It. — The SIBO Journey, Part 2

Once I had my diagnosis and a clear path forward, the first thing I did wasn't research the protocol.

What I did was check in with myself.

The only real reference point I had for what the next two weeks might look like was my sister. And her experience with the elemental diet had been rough. Really rough. Different lifestyle, different circumstances, but that image was sitting in my head whether I wanted it there or not.

And I've worked with enough people, and done enough of my own work, to know that the story you carry into something shapes the experience you have inside it.

So before I started, I sat down and got honest with myself.

What I Found

I asked myself some simple questions.

• What are my thoughts about this?

• What do I believe?

• What am I feeling?

Three things surfaced pretty clearly.

The first was a quiet tug-of-war between hope and self-protection.

Part of me genuinely wanted this to work; wanted answers, wanted relief, wanted to feel like myself again. And another part was already whispering: don't get your hopes up. What if it doesn't work? That I recognized. It's the part that's learned to manage disappointment by not expecting too much.

The second was a belief that I don't have enough discipline. That I'm not good at doing hard things.

Some of you who know me might find that hard to believe. I get it. But this one has been with me for a long time. It doesn't really care what I've accomplished. It just sits there, quiet and stubborn, ready to show up whenever something actually hard is on the table.

The third was the simplest and maybe the loudest: this is going to be hard.

Not a question. A verdict.

I want to pause here and offer you the same questions I asked myself. Because I'd be willing to bet at least one of these is sitting in you too.

What do you actually believe about the hard thing in front of you right now?

Not what you tell people. Not the version you lead with. 

Is there a part of you already managing the disappointment before it arrives?

A belief about your own discipline, your own capacity to do hard things, that shows up quietly and stubbornly every time the stakes get real?

And what's the verdict you've already handed down about how it's going to go?

Sit with those for a second. We'll come back to them.

What I Did With That Information

One of the frameworks we teach at MotivAction is simple enough to write on a napkin but deep enough to sit with for a lifetime:

Focus + Behavior = Results.

Your focus is your thoughts plus your emotions, what you're giving your attention to, what story you're telling yourself, what meaning you're making and the feeling along with all of it. Your behavior follows from that. And your results follow from both.

Which means if I walked into two weeks of liquid-only shakes carrying “this is going to be hard and you don't have enough discipline”, that's not just a mindset problem. That's a self-sabotage setup.

So I used a tool I use with clients all the time. The simplest way I can describe it is this: your brain holds pictures. It creates internal representations of things — experiences, memories, beliefs — and those pictures carry a feeling. A weight. An energy.

When I thought about the two-week protocol, the picture that came up was defeated. Heavy. Not empowered.

So I asked myself: when have I actually done something hard and succeeded?

And what came up immediately was ten years ago, when I quit drinking. Cold turkey. It was right after an incident that made it clear something had to change.

Fourteen months, zero alcohol. Even with the same environment. Same people. Every social situation was still right there to challenge me and yet, I was fully committed and unwilling to let my life keep going the direction it was going so I held strong.

I still barely drink to this day.

I hadn't thought about that in a while.

But when I did, when I really sat with that memory and what it felt like to be that version of me, the picture was completely different. Solid. Grounded. Full of conviction. Resolve.

So I took that picture and I let it replace the one I had about the shakes.

Simple. Not magic. Just a deliberate redirect of where my attention was anchored.

Remember those questions I asked you earlier?

What you actually believe about the hard thing in front of you. Whether there's a part already managing the disappointment. What verdict you've already handed down.

Here's what I want you to consider:

Whatever picture or thought came up when you thought about your hard thing, that's not fact. That's just the most familiar image, or a familiar story. And familiar isn't the same as fixed.

You can shift those beliefs, stories and images creating the current version of you. 

The question isn't always whether you have enough discipline, motivation, courage.

The question is what are you focused on?

The problem and the pain. Or the possibility and the desired outcome.

What It Made Possible

I believe that shift is a significant reason why the two weeks went the way they did.

There were hard moments. I'm not going to pretend otherwise. But not like I thought there would be. And more than once, when I caught myself starting to spiral into the old narrative, that image from ten years ago would surface and something steadied.

Your focus really does shape your experience. Not because positive thinking is magic. But because what you give your attention to determines what you're working with.

“Where you focus goes, your energy flows.”

I walked into the protocol more prepared.

Not perfectly.

Not without doubt.

But prepared.

I spent real time and real energy getting ready for the two weeks.

I did the belief work. I gathered support. I set myself up for success.

And none of that prepared me for what happens when the simplicity ends.

When the shakes stop and the real decisions start coming back; what to eat, when to eat, how much, and then the waiting to see how your body responds.

That part required something different.

Something I hadn't thought to build before I needed it.

Turns out, that's where the harder work was waiting.

This is part two of at least three blogs documenting my full SIBO journey. Stay tuned — there's more to this story.

If something in this landed, come find me at MotivAction.academy. And if you're someone who does hard things on the outside but struggles to believe it on the inside, you're not alone, and that's exactly the kind of work we do.